The Way To A Girl's Heart
by Kate-Emma
Summary: Sequel - Complete - Set one year after 'The Way to A Man's Heart', the new duo are torn apart by Bomber's lack of communication and the idea that this was not the best move they've ever made...
1. Part 1

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Sea Patrol. The song is 'If You're Gone' by Matchbox 20

The Way To A Girl's Heart…  
Song-Fic 3-Part Sequel to The Way To A Man's Heart  
Bomber/Spider

"You've got yourself some stiff competition there." Charge muttered jokingly to ET as the pair passed the rec room where Bomber and Spider sat talking, Spider's head in his hands and Bomber's hand on his shoulder.

ET just frowned. "As usual Charge I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about."

Charge just laughed. "The award for most obvious couple on board. You and Nav have some stiff competition."

ET shook his head. "Oh mate, they won that a long time ago, even before they stopped fighting." He chuckled.

_I think I've already lost you_  
_I think you're already gone  
_  
Back in the rec room things weren't as amusing. Following a boarding gone wrong the new duo had found themselves facing a suicidal foreigner. Despite their best efforts to talk him back, he slit his throat before falling off the boat and into the water. Being a trained seaman couldn't keep Spider from feeling bad, and his first suicide was starting to affect him. Bomber was there to listen, but having experienced one before, a long time ago, she wasn't exactly sure what he wanted her to say and just sat there feeling stupid at her inability to help him get over this faster. She knew he would move on the moment there was another ship to deal with, but just their luck the seas of the Coral had gone deathly quiet and there was nothing to keep the images from replaying themselves in their heads. Buffer had attempted to cheer Spider up, but the Seaman was visibly troubled still and this made Bomber worry. At night, when things were quiet, she still pictured those Russians and the barrel of the gun in her face. The few seconds of regrets she'd had when she had thought she was done for. Those moments held hostage. At the time she'd gone into an automatic state of self-preservation, but now, almost a year later, she started to remember that she had had feelings that day. Feelings of fear and regret. Images that she feared would stay with her forever, alongside those images she'd never forget. But now she worried whether the images of this man would haunt Spider's nightmares. In their sleep they weren't military trained, free from normal fears and strong. In their dreams they were just like everyone else - children in a world they couldn't control. A child of the 90s and late 80s horror films, the idea of Freddy Kruger killing you in your sleep had never been far-fetched to Bomber. For a long time she had felt her weakness in her sleep, be it dreams about death or that constant wish that she pushed back during the waking hours for that extremely human touch. And, without realising why, she suddenly felt uneasy and removed her hand from Spider's shoulder.

He must've felt her move because he looked up in her face to see the worry in her eyes. And all other images in Spider's mind were finally lost. Without any real knowledge in what the other had been thinking, Spider too had been thinking about that short but impactful ordeal with the Russians on Miriad Island. Only once since they'd been marooned there had the Hammersley passed the islands, and Spider had stood on the deck and watched the large island as they'd passed. But that day Bomber had avoided recognising where they were, and even Spider in general. In an attempt to get her attention he had even gone back to his once favoured art of irritating her, but had given up after ten minutes of stony silence. And the next day, when she'd returned to normal, she just changed the subject when he mentioned it. It seemed that she had wiped Miriad Island out of her mind, something that Spider found both comforting and painful. True, they had faced an inevitable death and the hands of some crazed Europeans more than once. Yes, they had gone days without food or water. And how could he forget Bomber's guilt at having been a part of the dislocation of his arm? But at the same time Miriad stood for him a period when he'd opened his eyes to reality. He could deny it on board the Hammersley, but the moment they'd become reliant on one-another to survive the truth about how strongly Spider felt for Bomber was revealed to him like a door had finally opened. An island in the middle of the Pacific, covered in rocks and gum trees, had become a wake-up call to him and despite everything he could only thank it for that. But right now it seemed like they were back to that day they passed the Miriad, Bomber's usually animated face emotionless and her sparkling eyes empty. Spider almost left the rec room to make sure they weren't passing the islands. But he knew they were nowhere near them and so had to ask.

"Bec, what is it?" He asked, removing his hands from his face and let one reach for hers. But she moved away.

"It's nothing. I need to start dinner." Then, pushing herself out of the seat and away from Spider's hand, she left the room quickly. Knowing he was required on the bridge soon, Spider didn't follow her, instead just staring at the door in a cold silence he hadn't felt since he'd first seen Bomber. And it was like she was gone for good.

_I think I'm finally scared now_  
_You think I'm weak_  
_I think you're wrong  
_  
His chance to see her when she came to the bridge with dinner that night had been dashed when, instead of her usually cheery smile, he'd been met with the plate being handed to him by the continuously moody RO who too had noticed Bomber's lack of cheeriness and gone down to see her. It was evident in his expression, especially when his eyes fell on Spider in judgement, that she had spoken to him and he felt a pang of jealousy. What he had with Bomber, whatever it was, he valued. They weren't like ET and Nikki, they both doubted they could be, but they had something different. He still teased her, she still ribbed him, and they spent almost every waking moment cursing each other down the halls of the Hammersley. But the affection that had been quietly evident long ago was there more so now. He had always confided in her, be it about the French flag incident or his issues with his overbearing mother. She had trusted him with things, be it her relationship with her mother or her worries about the smallest of things. And they had always looked out for each other, whatever the danger they may face by doing so. It was a teamwork and friendship they had built. But they hadn't yet talked about Miriad Island, and that had always confused Spider. His memories of that time were only of Bomber showing a side of her that he knew was there but had rarely seen. He'd been proud of her at that time and didn't understand why she wasn't proud of herself. He wanted to tell her what he remembered of that time, only the good memories, but they weren't like that. They were about having a good time, nothing serious and certainly not love, but as Spider's reliance on her presence and reassuring voice grew he wondered how long this would last. And he wondered whether she really wanted it to go any further. Maybe this stony silence was the beginning of the end of something that had only just started. He truly hoped it wasn't.

Down in the kitchen Bomber's mind was elsewhere. She was still caught up in her dreams and the thought of becoming this weak creature she knew was under the skin in everybody but she rarely allowed to come out. This hadn't come out of nowhere like she guessed Spider was now thinking. Women and their emotions. Rather these ideas had been born when she'd received an e-mail from her sister about their mother. Rebecca's relationship with her mother was strained, to say the least, but recently she'd been in contact with her. Since joining the Hammersley a lot of things she'd previously thought to be difficult had become easier to deal with. But evidently her new 'friendship' with her mother hadn't been strong enough for the woman to confide in her daughter that she was sick. Terribly sick. She had liver damage, something that had been attributed to her years of drinking, and if they didn't find a donor soon it was likely she wouldn't last long. Her sister, Jessica, had e-mailed Bomber the weekend before to ask her to come visit their mother on her next shore leave because it now looked likely they'd found a donor and they were already talking about the inevitable surgery. The reality of this relationship, death and everything else had suddenly started to overwhelm the normally hard Bomber and made her worry. Up until now she'd jumped onto boats, driven headlong into danger and just basically been a hard case because she'd had no one to worry about but herself. But now her mother was ill and yet still determined not to tell her anything, since Jessica was pregnant and had already had a few complications, and there was still the memories of Miriad Island, no longer was Bomber a self-sufficient creature. Her mother, her sister, her future niece or nephew, and Spider all made her stress. If anything happened to any of them she didn't know what she would do. And so, until her next shore leave and the time when she could finally address these problems in her usual way, Bomber sat back and stressed.

_I think you're already leaving_  
_Feels like your hand is on the door  
_  
For a week he was left in a cold silence, resorting to anything he could to get her attention, but nothing. On the job she was cold and hard, on the boat she was cold and silent, and even during breaks when he'd leave the bridge to find her in the rec room staring at the TV lost in her own thoughts, she was cold and a little bit broken. The light in her eyes, the one he'd seen in her eyes when she smiled or just generally insulted him, had gone out and in its place was a stony façade. He knew, or at least hoped desperately, that the Bomber he knew was under there somewhere. It was two days before their next shore leave, a few days away from the Hammersley, and already many of the crew had planned what they were doing. Spider, who had already promised his mother he'd visit her at least once, had planned to ask Bomber to meet up with him, if only once, during the shore leave. Now he wasn't so sure whether this was the best idea he'd ever had. But never one to think things through carefully, he asked her anyway, having found her in the rec room staring blankly at the bulkhead.

"Bomb, what's up?" Trying to sound cheery and keep the concern from his face, but she could see through his expression and he knew this when she sighed.

"Oh Spider, I'm sorry, I've been really horrible lately haven't I?" She resigned, surprising him but also causing him more concern.  
"It's just…" She trailed off.

Spider took a seat across from her. "Bec, you know you can tell me anything right?"

Bomber glanced up at him then; a look of surprise but also reservation on her face and despite often playing the fool Spider knew then that she wasn't going to tell him anything. So he wasn't surprised at all when she just sighed. "Yeah, I know. It's nothing." She plastered a strong face on, a cheery smile, but neither of them actually believed it.

But Spider knew better than to push her too far. "Okay, but if anything…" She nodded and he continued. "Look, I've got nothing planned for shore leave expect visiting my mother (he rolled his eyes to the sky as he said this and looked back at Bomber to find her smiling a little more genuinely) and I was hoping you had nothing planned either so I could have an excuse to get away from her." And as he said this and the smile faded from Bomber's face he knew he'd stuffed up again. She looked away from him before pushing herself to the edge of her seat, clearly about to leave.

"Oh, uh, Spi, I would, but… yeah." She finished lamely. She stood to hasten an exit but Spider stopped her, grabbing her wrist a little more forcefully than he'd originally intended. She took offence at this and her expression changed to anger before she twisted herself out of his grasp. "I'm sorry." But she didn't mean it and with that she left the room.

Standing there staring at the door he knew he'd stuffed up this time, now Bomber hated him, and silently he returned to the bridge.

_I thought this place was an empire_  
_Now I'm relaxed I can't be sure  
_  
Shore leave arrived quicker than Spider wanted it to, because the day it came he still hadn't managed to get through to Bomber yet. As the Hammersley pulled into dock he finally managed to find her, leaning against a random bulkhead, eyes closed, in a silent meditation. She looked so peaceful, something she hadn't looked in a very long time, and as he watched she gave a small smile and the corner of Spider's lips twitched at it. But then her eyes flickered open at the sound of voices from the deck above them and she saw Spider. Her smile fell quickly and she looked at him silently, almost as if she were trying to remember who he was. And then her brow furrowed and he knew she remembered. And she remembered they weren't talking. So, with a small huff, she turned away. But Spider wasn't going to take that.

"Bomber, stop. We need to talk." He said, taking a step towards her. To her surprise she did stop, if only long enough to let her shoulders slump before gathering herself and continuing to walk away. She made for her galley and Spider predicted this, taking the long way away around quickly so he was already in the room when she huffed in. Her eyes fell on him and she made to turn back, but he stopped her with an arm across her path. He hoped she wouldn't duck under this and to his relief she seemed a little too tired to do so. "We need to talk." Spider managed, slightly out of breath from trying to reach the galley first.  
She looked up at him with wide but tired eyes and just the slightest hint of tears before closing her eyes slowly and forcing the anger to return. He knew she didn't hate him but still there was the idea of her forcing it that made him uneasy. Why was she trying so hard to shut him out? What was it about her life that made her want him out of it? She finally spoke, but there were few answers in what she had to say and Spider knew he'd be leaving for shore leave with even more questions by the end of this conversation. "I don't want to talk Spider, I don't need to talk."

Spider shook his head. "This isn't like you Bomb. You haven't even tried to shove me out of your way yet." He tried humour, and it went down like a lead balloon.

"I'm so glad I give that impression." Bomber managed, not meeting his eyes this time.

Spider sighed. "Bec, you're strong and there's nothing wrong with that. Of course you scare me to hell, but in a good way. But right now you're not yourself and while we're getting it all out there, I don't like seeing you hurt."

He watched as a single tear slipped down Bomber's cheek, but rather than comfort her Spider just watched, now terribly unsure what to do. Maybe this was why he was so glad his sister was such a tomboy and didn't have these emotional moments. Wiping away the tear quickly Bomber looked up at him. "Thank you Billy." She touched his hand, if only for a moment before turning away. Spider let her go. At the door she stopped. "I have to go home, if only for a short while, that's why I can't see you this week." She bit her lip. "But I'd much rather stay here, with you."

Spider's mouth opened, preparing to say something, but there was nothing to say. So, instead he just nodded. Bomber took that well and gave him a small smile before walking away.

_And I think you're so mean_  
_I think we should try_  
_I think I can need this in my life  
_  
Grabbing his own stuff he headed out onto the deck and as he did he saw Bomber get into a taxi waiting at the end of the dock. He watched her glance back at the Hammersley and raised one arm in a lazy goodbye. But whether she didn't see him or just didn't wish to reply, Bomber didn't wave back. And Spider watched the taxi drive away before turning his attention to his mother who now stood on the docks assuming his wave had been for her. He gave her a genuine smile. He'd be back on the Hammersley in a few days and he'd speak to Bomber then. Until then there was nothing for him to worry about except the unenviable barrage of kisses he'd be receiving from his mother.


	2. Part 2

The Way To A Girl's Heart  
Part 2

Shore leave came and went and soon enough Spider found himself back in port staring up at the patrol boat. To his mother's pleasure, and his displeasure, he had spent almost the entire break with his family, and he hadn't heard from anyone in a while. So when they approached en masse on the docks he assumed they'd just missed him. Understandable. Instead he found himself facing a sea of questioning eyes until Nav asked it aloud.

"So, where's Bomber?"

Spider smiled cheekily but he worried what would prompt this. "She gave me the thumbs down a while ago Nav."

Nav just shook her head, her nose crinkling. "You don't know anything, do you?" Spider just tipped his head sideways with a grin and shrugged. Nav frowned at him. "The chef from the Waroona is on board. Bomber isn't back."

Spider frowned. He'd assumed she'd be back before they set sail again, she hadn't said otherwise. Unless she'd taken leave. He hoped she wasn't sick. But then a passing figure answered their questions. The smug-looking RO gave him a blank glance as he passed them, not stopping to speak but just passing them slowly. "I know where she is." He teased, looking like the cat who'd got the cream. "She went home."

Spider scoffed. "I could've told you that."

RO barely batted an eyelid. "Home to her hometown. Her mum is in hospital with liver damage." And with that he sauntered off.

Had Spider not been so worried about Bomber he may well have followed the smarmy git and punched him, but instead he just followed him onto the Hammersley lost in thought. Bomber's mum was really ill, dire if Bomber had returned to Mount Isa. She'd already confessed to Spider that she didn't have fond memories of her hometown. But more than his worry for Mrs Brown Spider worried about Rebecca. Why hadn't she told him? Because now he felt so useless.

_I think I'm scared  
I think too much_

Bomber's trip back to Mount Isa had been uneventful. Eventually the small Cessna plane she'd been travelling home in landed in the small strip of compacted dirt that the townsfolk called the airport and, almost no luggage with her, Bomber stepped off the plane. Standing at the edge of the runway was Jessica and her husband Tom. Jessica was almost an exact replica of Bomber, from head to toe, except she had longer hair. They used to be asked if they were twins, but in fact there was 3 years between them. And their personalities were very different. While Bomber ranged from kind and sweet to cold and cruel, Jessica had two levels of emotions; nice or really nice. As a teen Bomber used to envy her sister. Everyone loved Jessica, she was perfect. Good grades, beautiful girl and a lovely personality. On the other end of the scale Bomber took after their mother. A livewire with substandard grades and little charm. Bomber still didn't care what people thought, but over the years she had grown more like Jessica and less like the little ratbag kid that everyone in town thought destined to marry a passing biker and ride off into a hazy sunset. And although Jessica had been expected to achieve greater things, she was now a farmer's wife with her first child on the way. A noble job, but Bomber still couldn't help but feel superior to her sister. She'd got away from Mount Isa the first time she could. Jess was still here. Poor thing. But then she had Tom. Tom was the second nicest man she knew, behind RO, and never had a bad thing to say about anyone. He was the kind of guy who'd lend you his shoes and walk across hot sand barefoot just to ensure you did okay. Unfortunately this meant that far too many people took advantage of his kindness and the couple's farm, with the aid of the drought, was struggling. Their small financial aid from the government helped little and Bomber and her mother had both started lending them money. They had promised to pay it back, but Bomber didn't need it and knew she'd never ask for a repayment, no matter what.

"Becky!" Jess squealed as she spotted her sister and hurried over her, a smile brought to Bomber's face as she watched her 8-months-pregnant sister waddle towards her. Rather than make her go the whole way Bomber jogged up to meet her, hugging her sister as tightly as she could around her giant belly. She touched it softly and Jessica smiled. "Say hello to aunty Becky little one."

Bomber laughed. "Aunty Becky, now I do feel old." She glanced up and gave Tom a wave. He waved back but didn't join them, giving the sisters time to catch up. "How are you Jess?" Bomber asked, getting a little more serious as she looked back at her little sister.

Jessica gave a brave smile but it didn't reach her eyes. "Oh yeah, well, it's all fine."

Bomber knew this wasn't true but smiled back at her anyway. The baby had already faced complications, with the child facing the wrong way, it's head up towards Jessica's chest rather than the other way around. The doctors hoped it would move, but it now seemed unlikely and a caesarean was on the cards. Then there was the farm, which still posed problems, and their mother. With their mother in hospital the weight was off Jessica's chest for a little longer, but the moment she left hospital their mother would become Jessica's burden. Bomber felt guilty for doing this to her sister, but there was nothing she could do. She couldn't exactly pack up and leave the Navy for an untold period of time, not unless she never wanted to return. Not to mention the fact that despite everything she'd faced so far on the Hammersley, she could never leave her friends to go anywhere, let alone this place she had escaped from. But while Jessie stood here free of cares Bomber wasn't about to stick the knife in. "Good Jessie, good." She gave her sister another hug. "Now, I'm tired. Let's get out of this dusty disaster of an airfield."

Jessica chuckled and took Bomber's hand. "C'mon then, let's go before the poor dear gets too much of the land in her sister and loses her ability to walk on water." She muttered jokingly. Bomber laughed. If only she knew how much Bomber wishes she could walk on water, because if she could she'd be walking back to the Hammersley right now, wherever it was.

_I know it's wrong  
It's a problem I'm feeling_

The Hammersley had stopped and now, sick of staring at the same blank expanse of ocean on the EOD, Spider got to his feet and stretched. Nav glanced up from the maps before her and gave him a weak smile. Over at the controls Swain was starting to tap a rather annoying beat on the side of the armrest. They were all terribly bored. Earlier in the day they had spotted a fishing boat, but like many before it they had put their poles out when the RHIB got close, leaving the CO fuming and desperate to win this battle. Now their plan involved sneaking up on the little boat under cover of darkness and ambushing them, a tactic that the CO had attempted to employ before but had been shut down by SAS Captain Jim Roth in a hurried desire to get to Samaru. Not that Spider liked to think much about that day and how the whole week had ended so badly for him. Still, it had been his own fault. Bomber had told…

His thoughts and memories ceased then, caught up in other things. Bomber. It had been three days since they'd left port without her and although the Waroona chef, a cheery bloke called James, was a good cook, he was no Bomber. The galley was positively empty without her laugh, stupid faces and threats to poison his mashed potatoes. He hadn't had a decent battle of wits in a while and while Buffer entertained him enough, it wasn't as much fun as watching Bomber's hands close around a meat mallet when he appeared at the doorway and threaten to 'mallet' him with it. Then there was the normality of James' food, something which he never thought he'd regret having. He missed the feeling of confusion that came with receiving one of Bomber's creations and the look of disbelief he'd get from Bomber as she was again and again forced to explain exactly what it was. Of course he'd eat it, in his opinion anything Bomber did was outstanding, but it was still fun to have her look at him in that same way every meal time. It was one of the little things that made the Hammersley what it was, and with her gone the place seemed devoid of something. Just something little to her, but huge to Spider. The spirit of the Hammersley had gone to Mount Isa with Bomber.

_If you're gone  
Maybe it's time to come home  
There's an awful lot of breathing room but I can barely move_

The minute Bomber was settled in her sister's little homestead Jessie turned on her with a blank look. "We should go see mum straightaway." She said, not explaining anything.

Bomber frowned. "But she's only just out of surgery isn't she? She won't be up to visitors yet."

Jessie sighed and Bomber knew there was something else her sister wasn't sharing. Jess eventually explained. "I got a call this morning. There was a problem with the surgery. They wouldn't say what it was over the phone."

Although Bomber would rather avoid seeing her mother altogether she could see that Jessica was really worried and gave in. "Fine, let's go."

-

They reached the hospital, which was just outside Mount Isa, half an hour later. Tom had driven them but he didn't join them in the hospital, rather staying in the pick-up truck with a book. So, following Jess, who seemed to have memorised the way to their mother's room, Bomber sound found herself standing outside the closed door of private room 6. Their mother and her private health. She was such a snob sometimes. Knocking softly the door was opened by a middle-aged doctor who glanced briefly at Bomber before recognizing Jessica.

"Mrs Carlisle, come in." He ushered the sisters inside warmly, but his tone was defeatist. Bomber's eyes just went straight to their mother. The years hadn't been good to Grace Brown and now she looked even worse than Bomber ever imagined she could. As she heard Jessica introduce her to the doctor, Dr. William something, Bomber watched her mother's eyes move slowly. Her skin was so white it was almost transparent and she was starting to lose her hair. Although only 49, Grace looked very old. But there was something else wrong with her. The life in her that Bomber had always known, the anger that had been passed down to Bomber, was gone.

Bomber glanced back up at the doctor. "The surgery didn't go well, did it?" She came straight out and said, causing her sister to gasp softly.

The doctor didn't deny it and just gave a small nod. "No, it didn't. I'm sorry." He looked at Jessica. "That's why I called you this morning. I didn't want to tell you over the phone."

"Tell me what?" Poor Jessica looked terrified.

"The liver wasn't accepted by the body. It's not looking good." The doctor explained.

Bomber understood what this meant, but Jessica just looked confused. "So… so what are you going to do?"

The doctor sighed. "There's nothing we can do except hope. This liver took ages to get. I'm afraid there just aren't enough organ donors in Queensland." He glanced at Bomber but she just looked towards her mother who was now destined to die. "The liver purifies the blood. Without it functioning properly the blood becomes poisonous. And with the foreign liver within it speeds up the process. She doesn't have long."

Jess nearly collapsed under the weight of the revelation, but Bomber had seen it coming and just sighed. She led Jess over to a chair as the doctor gave them a sympathetic look and left the room. Leaving her sister sobbing uncontrollably in the corner Bomber just went to her mother's side.

"Oh Mum."

_If you're gone  
Baby you need to come home  
There's a little bit of something me in everything in you_

Standing on the edge of the deck, glancing up at the RHIB, Spider was joined by Buffer who just clapped him on the back before heading up the stairs to the RHIB. Spider joined him in the little boat a minute later. But as usual his mind was away with the pixies and he didn't notice the boat until the RHIB loomed up on it. Following Buffer on board he pulled his gun out as a man lunged towards them with a knife. Buffer dodged his advice and the man was surrounded but he didn't give up, turning on an unexpected Spider. Spider didn't notice that he was the man's target until he was too close to do anything and just stepped out of the way, causing the man to fall towards the edge of his own boat, momentum pushing him.

"What are you doing Spider?" Buffer's voice echoed in Spider's head and he woke up just as the man turned towards him again. This time Spider was quicker on his feet and pushed the man back into the corner, causing him to drop his knife. He then hastily handcuffed him, feeling silly under the gaze of Buffer who Spider knew was only watching him in case he stuffed up again. About 20 minutes later everyone was finished and Buffer walked towards Spider.

"What were you doing back there? You nearly got stabbed." Buffer asked.

But Spider had nothing to say and so felt stupid under the look of disappointment he was getting from Buffer. With a sigh he pulled one of the men to his feet and dragged him into the corner with the others.

_I bet you're hard to get over  
I get the room just won't shine_

The doctor had suggested that they talk to their mother as much as possible because she could still hear them, but Jessica was in such a bad state that Bomber was starting to worry about the baby and forced Tom to take her home. Alone with just her mother's solitary figure with her, Bomber started to talk to her.

"I didn't hate you mum, I just had to get away." She started, glancing at the woman that had caused her so much grief with nothing but pity. "I wanted to be dad, free of all this trouble. It was a nice idea I know, but that doesn't mean it was right to leave you and Jessie. It was selfish and I know this. But the Navy was my dream, to get away from the disapproving looks and a drunk mother and perfect sister." She sighed. "Everyone thought you were perfect too, and that I was the mad one. But that's not the case was it. I just hated it that you never put them right. I'm your daughter!" She sensed her anger swelling and pushed it back, trying to think of something better. Something nicer. She thought about the Hammersley and started to tell her mother about everything she'd experienced so far on that boat. She knew she was rambling on though and eventually stopped. Then another thought crossed her mind. Spider.

"I have a confession to make mum. I know you always told me to tell you when someone important came into my life, but I never believed you actually meant it. I mean, you were a drunk. But I know you just wanted Jess and I to be happy, even if that meant getting away from you. He makes me happy mum. Really happy. I didn't think it was possible that one person could create that kind of idea. I mean, so many. One minute I need to hear his voice, the next thing I want to hit him with a saucepan." She gave a soft laugh. "It's so silly really. But he's nice, you'd like him. Kind, considerate, witty, funny. Pain in the ass of course." She smiled. "I didn't tell him what was going on back here because he'd be worried. He's like that, more emotional than he likes to make out. Really caring. He'd invite himself along if he knew. Charge in here and try to solve all the problems in the world. Completely bugger things up, but still try. He's a tryer." She laughed. "Trying."

Bomber glanced up at her mum, the older woman's eyelids now barely moving. Bomber watched her, the echo of the machine that kept her alive floating around in her head, and confessed one last thing. "I was going to ask him to come, I was so close to it. Seems stupid doesn't it; he has to work, but still. My little fantasies mum. You always said I was a dreamer. My last day before coming here I thought about it. Picturing him walking into this room, winning you over with a smile before announcing that you were the coolest person he knew. Of course you'd hate him, I did at first, but then you'd come around. Everyone does. He's a lovable rogue. But that was when I thought you were going to be okay mum, and you're not are you?" She shook her head slowly. "No, you're not."

_I bet my hands I can stay here  
And I bet you need more than you mind_

Spider enjoyed the rec room, even if it did remind him that it was here that Bomber had turned cold on him and walked off into the sunset without a word of why she was going and how long she'd be gone. It made him think of the good times too. The times when he'd managed to make Bomber drop her tea by jumping out at her, the discussions about the French flag incident, the battle over the big screen TV they'd had when Ray Walsman had sent them the oversized electronic device or the day she'd finally confessed to him many things like her relationship with her mother and the real reason she never used to cook chips (something that had left Spider feeling terribly guilty). There were the good times, but still there lingered the threat that those good times were gone. If only he knew where he stood with her things would be okay. Maybe. He'd still miss her terribly.

There came a tap on the doorframe and Spider looked up to see Buffer glancing down at him, a worried look on his face. "Want some company mate?" He asked.

Spider smiled and nodded, watching Buffer enter the room. He headed straight to the bench by the door, leaning against it in his usual way, watching Spider who sat there lost in thought, one foot up on the seat and his arms crossed sullenly. "What happened out there?" Buffer asked eventually.

Spider glanced up at him and shook his head. "I don't know Buff, I really don't know. I just stuffed up, that's all."

Buffer sighed. "You're not like this Spider, usually I can count on you out there. You really let me down today."

Spider looked away. "Look, I know Buffer. I feel terrible enough already okay."

Buffer rubbed his head and frowned. "I'm not trying to make you feel terrible Spider." He sighed. "Whatever's on your mind, get it out there and get back to your usual self alright. You're built of tougher stuff than this Spi."

Spider smiled up at Buffer. "Thanks Buff." He expected Buffer to leave but when he didn't Spider realized Buffer was now prepared to take Spider's frustrations and this made Spider admire the man even more. "I'm being stupid Buffer, but it's really getting to me and I don't know why."

Buffer nodded, clearly he had no idea what Spider was on about, but supportive nonetheless.

Spider continued. "If I just knew why she didn't tell me about her problems I'd be fine, I'm sure. It's the not knowing."

Buffer smiled softly, finally catching on. "Bomber right?" He asked. Spider nodded. "Look mate, if I know anything about Bomber she's not the type to burden someone else with her problems or even show someone her feelings, unless of course it's anger, she does that one pretty well." Spider chuckled. "I'm sure that's all it is."

Spider nodded, knowing Buffer was right. "Yeah."

Buffer stood up then and went to the door but he stopped and glanced back at Spider. "You really like her, don't you?" He joked, giving Spider a grin.

Spider just frowned and waved him from the room, Buffer's laugh staying behind as Buffer himself left. But once he was gone Spider admitted something to the empty room.

"Yeah, I do."


	3. Part 3

The Way To A Girl's Heart…  
Part 3.

Spider was below deck when the Hammersley came within sight of the mainland. He and Buffer were re-restraining the fishermen who had now decided, this close to shore, that they could risk going overboard and finding their own way back. The idea that they could sit quietly had always been a bit silly, but it wasn't their job to hold people in shackles without reason. Now one had just been pulled from the railings and the other found trawling through belongings in one of the sailor's rooms they had reason. With a frown in their direction as he tightened the handcuffs ever so slightly, Spider heard the X announce their arrival at port. The trip was only to drop off the fishermen, and then they'd be out again, but it seemed they were meant to be picking up someone and Spider's suspicions and hopes had been raised when no one had told him who it was and the chef James seemed to be preparing to leave the ship. So, the minute he could escape the presence of the fishermen, Spider made his way onto the deck where he watched Buffer and Swain drag the fishermen up to where the gangplank was being raised. The CO and X were also on deck and he followed their eyes to the end of the port where two police and one young woman stood. Spider held his breath as he tried to get a better view of her. She was Bomber's height, short brown hair, and she was wearing overalls. But as she came closer he realised he was mistaken. Green overalls rather than blue. She was from Wildlife. She was the visitor they were expecting, and as she came on board she met Spider's eyes and gave him a brief smile before being led off by the CO.

As Spider watched a hand clapped him on the shoulder. "That Wildlife girl, she's a looker. I saw her checking you out!" Charge laughed as he passed Spider.

Spider frowned. "Hey Charge, you heard anything about Bomber? That James bloke is leaving." He motioned to the shore where the figure of James was now disappearing.

Charge shrugged. "Nah, except she took compassionate leave. Three weeks they're saying up on the bridge."

Spider lowered an eyebrow. "I haven't heard them talking about it."

Charge smiled. "Yeah, well, they're not idiots mate." He said with a mischievous glint in his eye. With that he walked away.

Spider just sighed and stared out at the land where the police were leading away the fishermen. Maybe they weren't idiots, but right now Spider felt like one.

_And I think you're so mean  
I think we should try  
I think I can need this is my life_  
_I think I'm just scared  
Do I talk too much?  
I know it's wrong and it's a problem I'm feeling_

The sisters stood by their mother's bedside for the rest of the week, and by Friday afternoon things were taking a definite turn for the worst. The doctors now doubted that their mother would live until the next week, and although Jess was visibly crushed she took the whole thing rather well, surprising both Bomber and Tom with her strength.

Twice already Tom had popped in to the hospital to make sure Jess was alright, but now the Brown girls were alone in the room and, silence enveloping her, Bomber decided it was time to really talk to her sister.

"Look Jess, I'm sorry for leaving you here to look after mum." She said suddenly, glancing at her sister.

Jessica just shrugged. "Bec, it's fine. I understand you had to run away and join the circus." She smiled.

Bomber grinned. "I did, but still, I left you here on your own."

Jessica shook her head. "Not alone. I always have Tom." She sighed happily at the thought of her husband. Bomber just watched her. Jess' eyes eventually met hers. "So, what about you dear sister? Is there someone?"

Bomber glanced back at their mother and then made her confession. "Yeah, someone. He's a pain in the ass, but someone."

Jess laughed. "I knew that if he liked you he'd have to be a little cracked."

Bomber frowned, but it was good-natured. "Jessie!" The sisters laughed then fell silent looking at their mother. For a few minutes they didn't speak and then Jess continued the questions.

"So, what's his name?"

Bomber glanced back at her with a smile, but kept her eyes on their mother. "Billy."

She sensed her sister smile. "Well, good on you sis."

Bomber just kept her eyes on their mother, lost in her own thoughts. She wondered where Spider was right now, and somewhere in the back of her mind she also hoped he was thinking of her. It was stupid but just the idea that he could be missing her was comforting, and she stuck with it.

Suddenly Bomber's attention was drawn away from their mother as Jessica muttered a long, drawn out groan and Bomber glanced back at her sister to find her clutching her stomach evidently in pain.

Bomber rushed to her. "Jessie? Jess, what is it?" She asked, glancing at Jess' stomach as if looking for answers.

Jess just looked overcome by pain and nearly collapsed but Bomber was able to get her back into her chair before rushing over to her mum's emergency call button and pressing it quickly. A few seconds later a nurse rushed in looking at their mum but finding her attention drawn to Jess who was now clearly in a lot of pain.

"She's 8 months pregnant. It's not…" Bomber started but the nurse had already gone to Jessica and hurriedly grabbing their mother's wheelchair in the corner had managed to get her into it. She wheeled her off before Bomber had a second to say anything and she just watched her now screaming sister disappear from sight.

_If you're gone  
Maybe it's time to come home  
There's an awful lot of breathing room but I can hardly move_

Spider curled his legs under himself as he sat cross-legged on the back deck of the Hammersley, almost in exactly the same spot Bomber usually sat. He stared up at the sunset, finally seeing what Bomber had already attempted to make him see. There was a peace in the sunset, and internal peace that wiped everything out of the mind. The mix of oranges, pinks and purples had the most profound comforting feel and everything bad that Spider had ever experienced was gone from his memory. Instead all he could think of was his best memories. Those holidays with his families, the time he'd been accepted into the Navy, and of course all the good times with Bomber. He couldn't deny that she controlled his headspace now, and if he was realistic he'd know she controlled his heart. Long ago he had stopped even seeing other women that he passed on the street, and even when women like the Wildlife woman checked him out he felt nothing but a small amount of ego. He'd remember it of course, just to tell Bomber and watch her reaction; it was a game of jealousy he played so he could see the small amount of hurt in her eyes. It was twisted, but the only time he could watch her hurt. In those times she couldn't deny him, and he could never deny her. But now she had run off Spider's mind was all over the place, and it wasn't until he sat down and watched the sunset that he realized why. He could say what they had was mateship, attraction and everything good, but there was just one word that came to mind right now and that was love. In the light of the sunset everything was exposed. Spider loved Bomber and he couldn't deny it any longer.

Spider cursed the sunset and it's ability to force the truth out of him. Maybe that was why Bomber liked standing here every afternoon. He'd once questioned her and she'd just replied mysteriously that there was something about sunrises and sunsets that revealed the soul. He'd looked at her funny, called her a loony and walked away, but now he understood. There was something magical about the sunset, and he vowed to join Bomber on the deck again when she came back, enjoy another sunset. Hopefully he'd be able to see inside her too then. See if she loved him.

_If you're gone  
Hell baby you need to come home  
There's a little bit of something me in everything in you_

The machine beside her mother's beside started to make a series of strange noises that woke Bomber from her stress-fuelled nap. She awoke quickly, barely breathing, just in time to see a nurse burst into the room, spurred on by the strange noises the machine was making.

"What? What's happening?" Bomber asked, standing up quickly. The doctor from before joined them and she went to him when the nurse ignored her. He just shook his head and ushered her out of the room.

"There must be a serious problem for the machine to react like that. I'm sorry." He said.

Bomber's thoughts changed to her sister and suddenly (and guiltily) she remembered where Jessica was. "Have you heard anything about my sister? Is the pregnancy going alright?"

The doctor sighed. "I haven't heard much. They're inducing a normal pregnancy, she had a reaction to the anastethic needed to perform a caesarean. I can't tell you how long it will take."

Again shut out, already having been tossed from her sister's room when Tom had arrived, Bomber stood at the door to her mother's room. Leaning against the doorframe, torn between watching the doctors' valiant but useless attempts to revive her mother, and forcing her way into maternity to make sure her sister was okay Bomber was overcome by emotions. Her mother was dying and now there was every possibility she could lose her sister and neice/nephew too. She wanted someone there with her, a friendly face who would hold her hand and tell her everything was going to be okay, but he was kilometres away so Bomber was alone. Rebecca was alone. Finally unable to fight it she sobbed, the tears rolling down her face and her sobs so hard she was struggling to breath. Losing all control of herself she felt her knees buckle and slid down the doorframe into a heap on the cold floor.

As she did somewhere down the hall a newborn baby started to cry.

_Something me…  
Everything in  
Something me in you  
_

Two Weeks Later:

Spider left for the shore, his military uniform back on, as slowly as usual. He loved his time on the Hammersley and missed it every time he went ashore, even if only for a few days like this stint was. But, as he reached the deck and prepared to leave the boat, his eyes were drawn to the shore. Standing there, staring up at the Hammersley in the cold silence they had parted in, was Bomber. He rubbed his eyes, hoping this time it really was her, and when he opened his eyes again it was still her. Hiding a small smile he left the ship, saluting on the way off as was required, and looked up to find her watching him, expressionless but nonetheless watching him leave.

As he passed Swain and ET he heard ET's voice but didn't look up as it stopped. Swain had obviously noticed Bomber too, where ET had not, and the pair now watched in silence. As they did they were joined by Nav who lowered her eyebrows, praying for the reunion they all hoped for. Spider, meanwhile, just needed to hear her voice.

"You're finally back?" He said as he reached her.

She nodded, her eyes not moving from him. And, as he watched, tears started to form in them. Unable to watch this, and wanting nothing else, he grabbed her and pulled her to him. Her hands clasped the back of his shirt as she returned the hug and her tears fell onto his shoulder. Allowing her a minute to gather herself he finally spoke.

"Your mother, she…?" He finished lamely. She pulled away from him and gave him a silent nod.

"And your sister, the baby…" He struggled again, hoping that it was fine. She gave him a sad smile at this.

"The baby is fine. Normal birth. A little boy. She named him Alex." She managed, her voice washing over him like a cool breeze in summer. Despite everything Spider smiled and Bomber reacted to this by just laying her head back on his shoulder. As they stood there in silence the others felt it was safe to approach them and as they did Bomber looked up and left Spider's grasp. Grabbing Nav's outstretched arm she allowed herself to be pulled away and led off by her friend, but as ET, Swain and Buffer surrounded Spider he saw her glance back at him with the smallest of smiles. And, happy with just that for now, Spider followed the boys to the pub.


End file.
